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Alvin & the Outcasts (transcript)

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Alvin & the Outcasts (transcript)
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This is a transcript page for Alvin & the Outcasts.


Transcript

Hiccup (v.o.)
There's an old Viking saying: "When your friends are roasting on the spit, you're the one who's feels the fire." Mildew has made the entire village believe that dragons are too wild, that we all can't live together in peace. He's wrong, and I'm going to prove it.
Snotlout
Arrrrrrgggh! We've been here for hours and we haven't found anything!
Hiccup
We've been here for ten minutes! And you've done nothing than build that!
Snotlout
That is Snotlout Manor. And all I need now is a queen.
Astrid
Ugh.
Tuffnut
Aaaarrrrrrrgggh!
Snotlout
What-What are you doing?!
Tuffnut
Storming the castle.
Hiccup
Come on, guys! I'm telling you, Mildew framed our dragons! I saw dragon feet in Mildew's house and I watched him throw them into the ocean.
Fishlegs
I don't mean to be Norbert the Negative, but the ocean is really, really vast. And our chances at finding those dragon feet are as good as Snotlout and Astrid--
Astrid
Don't go there.
Fishlegs
Going nowhere.
Astrid
Look, Fishlegs is right. Even if Mildew did throw them in the ocean, they're not just gonna wash up on shore here.
Snotlout
I found it!
Hiccup
GREAT! Ehm... You were saying?
Snotlout
I haven't seen since I was a baby. You never forget your first bludgeon.
Hiccup
Just keep looking.
Gobber
One down, 345 to go.
Stoick
Can't you do that any faster? Until you restock our weapons, we're completely defenseless.
Gobber
Maybe you should have thought about that before sending the dragons away.
Stoick
You know I had no choice. They destroyed the armory.
Gobber
This would be a bad time to get attacked.
Stoick
I know, Gobber.
Gobber
Not that there's ever a good time, but this would be particularly bad.
Stoick
I know, Gobber.
Gobber
Especially by Alvin. The Treacherous. Our oldest and most-feared enemy. Who'd kill us all to take Berk for his own.
Stoick
I got it, Gobber! Alvin the Treacherous...
Outcast #1
Alvin, they're coming back!
Alvin
Out of me way! You can't find good marauders anywhere these days.
Savage
Alvin, there are too many of them! We need to get inside!
Alvin
Oh, I've had it with these dragons! Is the ship ready?
Savage
We still have a little more work to do.
Alvin
That's not my problem, is it? We sail for Berk immediately. We'll land here and under the cover of night.
Savage
Why aren't we taking the whole army?
Alvin
We're not there to fight Stoick. We're there for one man: The Dragon Conqueror.
Savage
Oh, and you'll have him. We hear he's ten feet tall with the strength of a dozen men.
Alvin
Well, he shouldn't be too hard to find then, should he?
Hiccup
I'm telling you! I saw a pair of Zippleback feet in Mildew's house. He must have used them to make the footprints of the dragon who supposedly stole the boots.
Stoick
Well, then let's go have a look at them.
Hiccup
Yeah. Uh, there's gonna be a problem with that. I also saw him throw them into the ocean...
Stoick
I know you're upset about the dragons, son, but you're gonna need evidence to accuse a man of high treason.
Hiccup
Astrid, we'll prove Mildew did it. We have to if we ever want to see our dragons again.
Astrid
I just hope they're okay. Why would one of our ships be anchoring there?
Hiccup
It's not one of our ships. I gotta tell Dad. Come on!
Alvin
Ah, it's good to be back on the shores of Berk.
Savage
Good for you. Not so good for them.
Alvin
Let's find this Dragon Conqueror!
Stoick
This is no time to panic! That's what the Outcasts are counting on!
Sven
Stoick!
Stoick
Sven, did you get a count?
Sven
I saw thirty men at least, all armed to the teeth.
Gobber
Without my weapons, we'll never be able to fight them head on.
Mildew
No weapons! And Outcasts on our shores! All thanks to your boy and his dragons!
Stoick
I don't have time for this right now, Mildew. Mulch! You and Bucket gather the elders and the children. Get them to Thor's beach. They'll be save in the caves there.
Astrid
We can help fight! We've been trained as warriors.
Snotlout
She may have been trained, but I was born a warrior.
Stoick
Take this. It was Alvin's. But go with the others. You can help protect them.
Hiccup
Let me go get the dragons. At least if we have them, Dad, we can defend ourselves.
Stoick
Go. But be careful. You don't know what Alvin is capable of. The rest of you: We'll head to the woods. Nobody knows that forest like we do.
Gobber
And when Alvin comes to looking for us there, he'll walk right into our trap!
Fishlegs
Oh, Meatlug, I miss you. The moon is full, my heart is empty. What rhymes with empty?
Alvin
Don't waste your time. Nothing rhymes with "empty". Who's the Dragon Conqueror?
Fishlegs
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Hiccup
Ah! Fishlegs!
Fishlegs
Alvin's looking for you. He's looking for the Dragon Conqueror.
Alvin
Looks like Stoick isn't as armed as we'd anticipated.
Savage
From the looks of the armory, he's not armed at all.
Alvin
Hmm... Should I knock? I mean, what's the etiquette in these situations?
Alvin
I think that seems about right. Stoick! Show your face!
Alvin
The old coward's turned and run.
Outcast #2
I spotted fresh tracks leading into the forest. And I heard reports of a big guy with a bucket on his head heading down to the beach.
Alvin
Ehh, we'll split up. You four, go into the woods.
Outcast #1
Where are we going?
Alvin
We'll go to the beach! How many hostages do you think a Dragon Conqueror is worth?
Outcasts
Seven! No! Eight!
Fishlegs
What do we do now?
Hiccup
Go to the woods and warn my father. I need to get ahead of Alvin and warn Mulch and the others.
Gobber
When they come looking for us in the forest, they'll have to come through here.
Stoick
Alright. What do we have?
Gobber
Two frying pans, a rolling pin, and a kitchen knife.
Stoick
And what are we going to do when we find Alvin? Bake him a cake?!
Gobber
Eh, pie would be nice, too. Who doesn't like pie?
Gobber
That could be useful!
Mulch
Hurry now! The cave is just up ahead.
Mulch
Where's Bucket?
Little Girl
He went back to get my Lamby.
Mulch
Oh, for the love of... Why am I always looking for Bucket? Hey, yeah, why can't he-- Bucket? It's like trying to keep track of a half-wit pig.
Mulch
Ugh, Bucket! You had one job: Bring up the rear.
Bucket
But the little girl! You should've seen the look on her face, big blue eyes with the tears welling up.
Mulch
Ugh, oh... your bucket's hard, but your heart is soft. Come on, come on.
Mulch
Uh-oh...
Alvin
You made it easy for us, Bucket. It's hard to miss a half-wit and his lamb.
Outcast #2
Keep moving!
Outcast #3
There he is! Get him!
Gobber
Oh, you lousy Outcasts! You'll never take me alive!
Outcast #4
Come on, get him!
Gobber
Ugh. Looks like you got me, boys.
Outcasts
Come on, get him!
Gobber
Or maybe it's we who've got you.
Stoick
That way. Over there.
Fishlegs
Stoick! No!
Stoick
For the love of Thor, Fishlegs, I could have killed you!
Fishlegs
Thank you... For not killing me.
Stoick
What are you doing here?
Fishlegs
Alvin the Treacherous grabbed me. He looked really treacherous.
Stoick
I know they're here, Fishlegs.
Fishlegs
Yeah. They're here for Hiccup.
Stoick
Hiccup?
Alvin
For those of you who haven't figured it out...I am the one and only Alvin the Treacherous. And let me be clear, that name was earned.
Tuffnut
"Alvin"? Pft... How did he earn that?
Alvin
Your leader has abandoned ya. But Stoick doesn't concern me. I'm not here for him. I want the Dragon Conqueror.
Mildew
Say goodbye to Hiccup.
Mildew
Alvin!
Astrid
My grandfather's frail. He needs his nap.
Alvin
Well, like I said...tell me who the Dragon Conqueror is and you can all go free.
Snotlout
Conqueror? Come on! I'll show Alvin who's a conqueror.
Snotlout
For you, sir.
Alvin
Well, you'd better check your trousers, son. I think you've soiled yourself.
Alvin
Will you look at that! My old hatchet. I was wondering when I'd get that back.
Alvin
Trying to kill Alvin the Treacherous? Ooh hoo! You're not as smart as you look. Tell me, who's your Dragon Conqueror, eh?
Alvin
Tell me!
Hiccup
Leave her alone!
Astrid
Hiccup! What are you doing?
Hiccup
I'm the Dragon Conqueror.
Alvin
You? Stoick's little embarrassment?
Hiccup
I drove the dragons from Berk. Look around. You don't see any on this island, do you?
Astrid
I-It's true! All the dragons are afraid of him. He even conquered a Night Fury!
Alvin
You're bluffing.
Hiccup
Am I? Well, there's only one way to find out. Take me to Dragon Island.
Stoick
Where's Alvin?!
Astrid
Alvin took Hiccup.
Stoick
What?!
Astrid
He gave himself up. They're on their way to Dragon Island.
Alvin
I'm sure you're father's told you plenty about your island's most feared enemy.
Hiccup
Wh-who's that? Oh, right, uh, you. No. Not so much.
Alvin
Really? Not a word?
Hiccup
Nope.
Alvin
Nothing?
Hiccup
Uh-uh.
Alvin
Nothing about Alvin?
Hiccup
Nope.
Hiccup
Look, 'Al', all I care about is that if I do what I say, you will leave the people of Berk in peace.
Alvin
On me word, son!
Stoick
When we get there, we'll lay down cover fire with these catapults. Astrid, you get your dragons.
Snotlout
No! Save your cover fire for the others, sir. I can handle myself.
Gobber
I'll fire extra rounds to cover that one.
Tuffnut
Sir, we'd like to personally volunteer to kick Alvin's butt.
Stoick
This isn't about Alvin. It's about Hiccup. We're here to bring him home.
Hiccup
Hey, is the sword really necessary?
Alvin
Odin's Ghost!
Alvin
Is that a...?
Hiccup
Night Fury! The unholy offspring of lightning and death itself!
Hiccup
Ah, stop!
Hiccup
...It will only make him angrier! Watch and learn.
Alvin
By all means, proceed. Heheheheh! I hope you're not squeamish. You're about to see a dragon eat a boy.
Hiccup
I missed you, too...w-we'll catch up later. Right now, follow my lead.
Hiccup
You cannot defeat me! You dirty dragon! I am the Dragon Conqueror!
Alvin
Hey, what are you doing with that dragon?!
Hiccup
By the way, it's not really "Dragon Conqueror", it's "Dragon Trainer"! Now!
Alvin
Great thunder of Thor! He is the Dragon Conqueror! Fire!
Hiccup
Look out! Whoa! Whoa! Hey!
Alvin
What are you waiting for?! Shoot him down!
Outcasts
There he is! Now we've got him!
Alvin
Fire!
Hiccup
Oh, what took you so long?
Astrid
Why, did you miss me?
Snotlout
Hiccup!
Hiccup
We've gotta get in closer!
Stoick
Aim for their catapults! If we knock them out, the dragons can finish off the ship! Fire!
Alvin
Move offshore!
Hiccup
Here's our chance! Come on!
Alvin
Oh, shoot that dragon down! Fire!
Hiccup
ASTRID!
Astrid
HICCUP!
Alvin
Welcome aboard, Astrid. Don't miss this time!
Hiccup
Look out!
Hiccup
Hold your fire! He's got Astrid!
Hiccup
What are you doing?!
Snotlout
I heard you say "fire"!
Hiccup
I said "Hold your fire!"
Snotlout
See?! You said it again!
Stoick
No, he's right!
Snotlout
Thank you!
Stoick
Fire again, Hiccup! All of you!
Hiccup
Everyone! Fire into the water!
Alvin
Fire!
Outcast
At what?
Alvin
Everything!
Outcasts
Did you hear that? Oh, what's that?!
Hiccup
Astrid, hop on!
Stoick
You're a coward taking my son.
Alvin
I take what I want! You know that, Stoick!
Stoick
Not this time.
Stoick
NOW, HICCUP! BURN THE SHIP!
Hiccup
Here we go, guys! HIT 'EM WITH EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT!
Stoick
Hiccup, what were you thinking?
Hiccup
I was thinking... all I needed to do was to get to Toothless. And together, we'd be able to make things right.
Alvin
They ride dragons! We get that boy, and we'll ride dragons!
Hiccup
You hear that, bud? You're back home.
Mildew
What are you cheering about? Don't you remember what these beasts have done?!
Stoick
I do. They saved our lives.
Hiccup
And I may not be able to prove what you've done, but I will never forget it.
Hiccup (v.o.)
It's funny how an attack by your greatest enemy can change things overnight. I set out to prove that our dragons would never hurt us... what they proved, is that they will always protect us.


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In Dragons We Trust (transcript)
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How to Pick Your Dragon (transcript)

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