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Bing! Bam! Boom! (transcript)

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"With Vikings on the backs of dragons, the world just got a whole lot bigger."
Hiccup Horrendous Haddock[src]


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Bing! Bam! Boom! (transcript)
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This is a transcript page for Bing! Bam! Boom!.


Transcript

There we go. [grunts]

There, that should do it.

So what do you think, bud?

[Toothless grumbles]

[i]Ah, reserving your opinion till you see it work.

I'm good with that.

Hiccup, are you up there?

Thornado and I were busy surveying the village and...

What in the name of thor is that contraption?

I call it the thunder-ear.

It can track dragon sounds from miles away.

And that hopefully includes our friend, the Screaming Death.

And you're just in time to see me demonstrate.

All right, demonstrate away.

Okay, now put your ear up to this.

Toothless, plasma blast.

Oh, there's the signal, girl. Do you remember the song?

What am I saying? Of course you do.

♪ Well, I've got my ax, and I've got my mace ♪ ♪ and I love my wife with the ugly face ♪ ♪ I'm a Viking through and through ♪

All right, Fishlegs.

You and Meatlug come out from wherever you're hiding.

Very funny, son. Joke's on the chief.

Dad, it's not a joke. Look.

♪ Well, I've got my club, and I've got my bludgeon ♪
♪ and 16 Berserkers locked in my dungeon ♪
♪ I'm a Viking through and through ♪

# ooh ooh ay yeah #

Ugh.

I think we could use this to hear enemy ships approaching as well.

That thunder-ear gets the chief's seal of...

Hang on.

The dragons we've slain!

Is that...

Stoick?

Ha! He'd be lost without me.

I'm his right-hook man, you might say.

Of course he'd never admit it.

And if you repeat this, I'll deny I was ever here.

[grumbles] Right-hook man, eh?

[screeching]

Ugh, oh, you can signal Fishlegs and Meatlug to stop.

I don't know who's a worse singer, boy or the dragon.

Uh, that's not Fishlegs. [screeching]

Yeah, no, definitely not Fishlegs.

Well, if it's not Fishlegs, then who or what is it?

Only one way to find out.

My thoughts exactly.

[whistles]

Ah, would you look at that? I never get tired of seeing that magnificent beast make his entrance.

I thought it was coming from out here.

[screeching] Whoa, Thornado!

I'll do the steering, if you don't mind.

No, Dad, let him go. I think he hears something.

[screeching]

Whoa, are those... baby Thunderdrums?

Odin's ghost! No wonder Thornado knew where to take us.

But what are they doing all the way out here by themselves?

[dragons screeching]

Watch yourself, laddy. I'm a chief, you know.

Dad, they're just kids. They're playing.

Well, someone needs to tell them that playtime is over.

[Thornado roars]

Well, looks like someone just did.

[laughs] I taught him that.

I thought I recognized that roar.

You do have to admit that they're kind of, well...

Cute? Cuddly?

I was gonna say cool.

Hey, so, uh, Dad...

Eh-eh-eh, I know what you're thinking, and you might as well forget it.

[Thunderdrums screech]

Ugh, there's enough racket on Berk with those twins.

No, no, I guess... I guess you're right.

I just hope they'll be okay.

Of course they'll be okay. They're Thunderdrums, after all.

Toughest dragon in the archipelago.

[Toothless grunts] That's right. I said it.

Ah, we've created a monster.

[Thunderdrums screech]

Out for a little father-son flight, were we?

Actually, we were just testing the thunder-ear.

Thunder-ear, is that what you're calling it? Catchy.

Oh, I'm glad you like it, Gobber, because you and the thunder-ear are on night watch together.

All night, as a matter of fact.

You know I'd love to, Stoick, really, I would, but I'm performing my one-viking spectacular at the great hall tonight.

I'm closing with a rousing rendition of the reindeer waltz on the panpipes.

It's sublime.

I'm afraid the village will have to do without your panpipes tonight, Gobber, because my right-hook man is going to be doing his duty for his chief.

The one who'd be nothing without him. [chuckles]

Thunder-ear.

I've got a different name for it.

[dragons screeching]

[rumbling]

Oh, what... what... what's happening? What?

What's going on?

I was about to ask you the same question.

[dragons screeching]

Oh.

[sheep bleat]

[Thunderdrum screeches]

[man screaming]

[glass shatters]

[all shouting]

Still think they're cool?

Um, I'm on the fence.

Well, get off it and do something before we have to rebuild the entire village.

Meatlug, look at the little baby Thunderdrums.

They are so cute. [both roar]

Whoa! Wow.

Thanks, girl.

[Thunderdrum roars]

Okay, guys, fun time's over!

Duck, Silent Sven!

Sorry about that, Sven.

Oh, come on, not...

[yelps] My shop!

Sorry, Gobber. I'm trying my best.

Should I even bother asking what's going on?

Out of control baby Thunderdrums.

Yep, that's what's going on.

[Thunderdrum roars]

[groans]

And I'm guessing you'd like them under control?

That would be preferred, yes.

Can you help me wrangle them into the academy?

Thought you'd never ask.

Wow, they're slippery little guys.

No kidding.

Whoa!

What are those things?

They are loud and destructive dragons.

We have to stop them.

Au contraire.

We must own them.

Immediately.

[grunts]

You're all mine.

I'm coming in too hot! Pull up, pull up!

[both scream]

[sighs]

Do I have to do everything myself?

[people screaming]

[Thunderdrums roar]

[yells]

[Thunderdrums roaring]

[Thornado roars]

Well Done, Dad.

Look at that.

They're putty in Thornado's hand.

Paw. Claws. Whatever.

Okay, we want that one.

No, that one.

It's such a hard decision. Okay, we'll take the set.

Quiet! Hiccup, I want you to get those troublemakers off this island now.

Okay, we'll go, but know this.

Our mother will miss us.

Not you.

The dragons.

Oh.

[laughs]

You had me there for a minute, chief.

Because we're also... troublemakers.

Dad, don't you think we'd be better off training them?

Think about it, they're fast, powerful...

Destructive, loud, and out of control.

Uh, chief, you're kinda making Hiccup's argument for him.

The lad's got a point, Stoick.

A squadron of Thunderdrums would be tough for Dagur and the Berserkers to defend against.

You really think you can get them under control, son?

I know we can.

I mean, look how great Thornado turned out to be.

Well, he is quite spectacular.

We can do it, chief. Please let us try.

All right, fine. But the first sign of trouble, they go.

Thornado isn't their mother or a babysitter.

He's got chiefly duties, just like I do.

Dad, you won't be sorry, I promise.

I already have a whole plan laid out on how to train them.

[Thunderdrums roar]

Okay, now might be a good time to roll out that big plan of yours.

Right, right. Big plan.

Uh, okay.

Let me guess, you have no plan.

You... you're right. That would be correct.

Well, don't you think you better get one before our ears explode?

Wait!

Wait, our ears can actually explode?

Let's see!

[Thunderdrum roars] Yes, explode, explode!

Come on. Don't encourage them.

The twins or the Thunderdrums?

Neither.

Thornado!

[Thornado grumbles] Thornado, let's go.

All right, so, uh, I guess the first thing we should do is name them.

No, first thing we need to do is to get them to shut up!

Over here!

Ouch, ow, ow!

Dragon nip. Old school, but effective.

[Thunderdrums coo]

Great.

But we can't have them laying around in a haze doing nothing all day.

Yeah, that's what the twins are for.

Whoa, whoa, don't judge. We already did something today.

Yeah.

What? What did you do?

What did we do? What did we do?!

Uh, what did we do?

We named them.

Oh, this should be good.

Oh, it is.

Ready?

Now wait for it.

Bing!

Bam!

And... Lloyd.

You can thank us later.

Call me crazy, but I'm thinking there might be a more logical choice than "Lloyd."

Like what?

Uh, Boom?

Oh, yeah, I guess that could work. No way.

How about Darren?

Sorry, Lloyd.

All right, now that that's all taken care of, let's try some actual training.

Uh, voting is still open on the Lloyd thing, though, right?

Right?

Okay.

Okay, just checking. Darren's still on the table, though, right?

[laughs] No?

Wow, that could have gone far worse.

[Thunderdrums roar]

Whoa! Ow!

You mean like that?

[strained] Yep, exactly like that.

Stay. Stay.

[Thunderdrums chirp]

Clearly "stay" isn't in their vocabulary.

[crash]

Well, that should teach them.

[roaring]

[sighs]

This is what you guys need. Something you're supposed to destroy.

Hookfang, show 'em how it's done.

Here. Right here, thunderdumbs.

Do I need to spell it out for you?

Destr... oh, no! [Thunderdrums roar]

Bull's-eye.

Okay, I'm gonna show you how to disarm an attacker.

Oh, my sword!

Ah! What? Give me that!

No, come... come on, you guys.

This isn't the exercise.

What? You too, Meatlug?

[Thunderdrum chirps]

Oh, dear.

Okay, here we go. Repeat after me.

[belching] "A." [Thunderdrums burp]

[belching] "B." [Thunderdrums burp]

Hey, uh, not to be a wet blanket, but how is this helping anything?

How is it hurting?

[belching] "C."

[Thunderdrums roar]

Oh, no!

See? They love it!

Oh, not so fast, fellas.

We still have a few more exercises to work on.

[Toothless grumbles] I know, pal.

The word "excruciating" comes to mind.

[Thunderdrums howl]

Ha ha, yeah!

Awesome!

[groans]

Huh, will you look at that?

Finally getting through to them.

Well, someone is.

Okay, Thornado. How about a little follow the leader?

That was promising. Eh, bud?

Yeah, I hardly recognize them.

[gasps] What did you do? You've ruined them.

Oh, Lloyd! I'm so sorry, Darren.

Thornado? Thornado!

Come now. We have chiefing to do.

[Thornado grumbles]

Hmm. Well, that's an improvement.

Well done, Hiccup.

Well, no, Dad, it's actually... [Thunderdrums shriek]

Oh, for the love of Thor.

Tuffnut, the gate!

Got it.

[groans] What?

Okay, a little clarity next time would help.

[Thunderdrums roar]

Oh, come on.

Hiccup!

I thought you had them under control.

Well, I did, sort of, but...

[grumbles] Not at all.

Okay, I really didn't.

Ah, will these dragons ever quiet down?

Sure, once they find their grown-up voice.

And how long will that take?

It shouldn't be more than a couple of... years.

[groans] Uh, yes.

[screams] Get off, get away!

Just want you to know, we're big fans.

Both: Look out!

[glass shatters]

Ha ha! End of the line, Bing. Or are you Lloyd?

[Thunderdrum roars]

[screams]

[Thunderdrum roars]

[sheep bleat]

You leave those sheep alone!

[Thunderdrum roars]

[sheep bleat] Never mind. I wasn't that close to them.

Ugh, it's ridiculous.

They look like Gobber wrestling a greased yak.

Don't even think about it.

[Thornado roars]

[chicken clucks]

[sheep bleat]

[crash]

[mooing]

Remember how you said I wouldn't be sorry?

This is outrageous!

Uh, yes?

Well, I'm officially sorry.

You need to find those dragons a new home, son.

The Thunderdrums have to go.

Okay. Bing, Bam, and Boom, welcome to your new home: Dragon island!

You're gonna love it here. Plenty of room.

Lots of new dragons to annoy... I mean, meet.

You know, here, you can be as loud as you want.

It'll be great.

Whoa. This is kinda sad.

Yeah.

Reminds me of the time our parents took Sam, our pet yak, out to that farm to live.

Yeah, I would have cried all night... except for those delicious yak steaks we had for dinner.

Oh, nothing better.

And to eat them in those soft yak jackets.

Okay, great. Check you later.

[Thunderdrums chirp]

They'll be happy there. They'll love it.

What's not to love? It's an island full of dragons.

And, I mean, we can come visit them, right?

Sure, but they won't be there.

Why not?

'Cause they're right behind you.

What?

Oh, great. What do we do now?

I'll tell you what we do. We ditch 'em!

[laughs] We did it, Hookfang.

Stupid baby dragons. Oh, no.

[Thunderdrums roar] Whoa!

[splash]

Uh, Hookfang?

Hookfang!

Wow. That was fun.

Let's try Snotlout's plan again. [sighs]

I think this might be our chance to go.

Yeah, and I say we take the long way home this time, so they don't follow us.

Oh, what... I just... are you... how?

Never mind. It looks like Thornado and I are gonna have to give you dragon training geniuses a hand.

I hope this works.

Thornado has a way with them.

It'll work.

[Thornado roars]

Attaboy, Thornado.

Sometimes you need to show teenagers a little tough love.

That's right, I said it.

[groans]

Okay, so this is it.

Listen, guys, Berk just isn't the island for you.

There's too many Vikings and not enough places for you guys to play.

[Thunderdrums whimper] Oh, no, no, no, no.

Stop making that whimper sound.

Don't make this any harder than it already is.

Let's let Thornado have a word with them.

[Thornado roars]

Well, that's done. Put that in the Book of Dragons.

Thornado, back to Berk.

Don't look back, son. Remember, tough love.

Aah!

Looks like they might not be welcome on Dragon island either.

Maybe that's why we found them out on the sea stacks to begin with.

Oh, they were probably chased there.

[Thornado growls]

Well, I guess we're not gonna let any wild dragons bully our boys, are we?

Tough love, huh?

[Thunderdrums chirp]

[dragon growls]

[Thunderdrum roars]

[dragon roars]

[dragons roaring]

[both growl]

Okay, bud, light 'em up.

[screams]

[laughs] Yay, team.

Hey, you two.

[Thornado roars]

[Thornado growls]

[Thunderdrum chirps]

Hiccup, Fishlegs!

[all roar]

Whew, sure taught those wild dragons a lesson.

Yeah, this time.

What are we gonna do with these guys?

We can't take them with us, and we can't leave them here.

Dad?

Are you... okay?

Yes, son.

I think we both know what we have to do, don't we, Thornado?

Dad, what are you doing?

I'm setting Thornado free.

Do what any chief would do in this situation.

Or any father.

These boys won't survive without you.

Right now, they need you more than I do.

[sniffles]

Ah, I understand. I'd do the same thing.

It doesn't mean I won't miss you.

Take care of your new family.

[Thornado chirps]

Hey, Dad, you did the right thing.

Good-bye, old friend.

[dragons roar]


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